Sally's view of the world

I was gonna do Al's music thing but my iPod is woefully out of date and contains some embarrassing titles. I'll probably try it tomorrow at work with my Pandora stream....same concept, right?

I don't read or post much here anymore. I'm spending a lot of my time with Twitter (@soxgal) and I'll be experimenting with WordPress and posting my thoughts over at http://www.soxgal.net

Of course, soxgal.net will only be updated and worked on if I can get some free minutes.

It seems like so many years ago that I never thought I'd be married again or have any children. The divorce exacerbated my depression and I cured a lot of it through retail therapy. I'll admit I was young and stupid, but the only one suffering from my fiscal irresponsibility was me.

When I finally started feeling better about life I decided to go to grad school and get a Masters degree. The thought was that even though I'd have a boatload of student loans to pay, the advanced degree should provide a higher salary.

Along the way I met Brandon and what seemed an innocent first few dates turned into having a husband and child. We're doing absolutely everything we can to make things work, but I feel guilty that no matter how hard we work and no matter how much we seem to get a leg up on things it's never enough.

Travis shouldn't have to spend a few nights each week away from his mom and dad, but that's what it takes for him to be cared for while Brandon and I are at work. That's the arrangement that is tearing me up the most. My in-laws offered to take him without us asking and quite honestly, if they hadn't I really don't know how we'd manage. But the fact that we are so dependent on them makes me feel like I'm a bad mother and can't care and provide for my own son. I don't even know how to begin the thank yous to everyone who's been helping us with Travis. The words 'thank you' are simply not enough.

I took a new job that starts Monday. I'll be working as a researcher/data analyst at eInvite.com out in West Boylston.

I'm still doing weekends at Eddie Bauer for the pocket change and employee discount. I found a babysitter who will be able to do Saturdays for me pretty regularly but I will need coverage a few Saturdays here and there. If anyone wants to have fun with Travis this month, it looks like I'll need a sitter for the following Saturdays:

UPDATE: November 15, not November 22
UPDATE: November 29 (filled)

I'm not exactly sure what time my shift will be, but lately it's been 12-4 or 12-5 so I'll probably need someone here from 11:30 - 5:30ish. Let me or Brandon know if you're interested in helping us out those weekends.

We're running a Friends & Family discount weekend November 14-16. Let me know if you want me to send you the 30% off coupon (postal mail).

There would be no reason to live without Star Trek. My dad got to see Gene Roddenberry speak on his campus and when TNG came out, he taped the Encounter at Farpoint episode and forced me to watch it with him. It was a real father-daughter bonding moment and will always be special to me.

I'm going back to work the first week in November. We are in need of babysitting for Monday, November 3 and for Wednesdays in November. We should have every other date set. We're also looking for people interested in sitting for us occasionally on nights and weekends.

If you know anyone available or services you recommend, let us know.

There have been layoffs within my department. I'm really wondering what kind of an environment I'll be going back to in November.

Last night Travis was sleeping with his arms over his head. It looked like a ref calling a field goal good. I guess he'll be a football fan like his daddy.

In some ways I feel guilty that I'm able to be home with Travis these first few weeks while Brandon has to work. Maybe when his vacation time resets he can take a few days to stay home, if that's something he'd like to do.

I'm still amazed at how good Brandon is with Travis. We are lucky to have such a great man around.

Mom got home from the hospital last night. MRI came back and didn't show any new lesions on her brain, which is good. No one really has been able to figure out what caused all her symptoms, but she did have an elevated core body temp so the theory is that's what got her all sluggish. Doctors ordered her not to fly this weekend, so she won't be coming to stay with me and Travis. It's best that she not come and I'm glad the decision was made for her but at the same time it would have been nice to see my mom and for her to meet her grandson. At this rate, my parents really won't get a chance to visit until Christmas when Travis is already 3 months old.

I'll be home all week and not really able to get out and about on my own. If anyone wants to visit, please do. Travis and I have doctor's appointments on Monday afternoon, but other than that, we're around all week. Not sure how I'm going to get to the doc with Travis, but I have the weekend to figure it out.

But not for me. My mother is in the hospital down in Florida and no one really knows yet what's wrong or how bad it is. She wasn't feeling well yesterday after lunch and had trouble teaching her afternoon classes. When my dad went to her classroom he said she had her head on her desk and her eyes were closed. She was nonresponsive when he called her name.

I talked to him a little bit tonight as he, my sister and brother-in-law were visiting and bringing her some stuff. She was going to come up here on Sunday and stay for a week with me, Brandon and Travis but it's quite likely she won't be able to make the trip. When I talked to Mom for a little bit, she kept apologizing to me. I told her she didn't need to apologize and the important thing was for her to take care of herself and concentrate on getting well.

She's going to have an MRI in the next day or so to see if there are any new lesions on her brain. The current thinking is that she's having some sort of multiple sclerosis flare up that's causing these problems. Whatever it is, I hope they figure it out soon and that she gets well again.

I could use some positive thoughts and phone calls over this next week, especially if I'm home alone with Travis while Brandon is at work.

See the new baby

It's nice to finally be out of the hospital. Little Travis did everything in his power to avoid being born, but he joined us on Tuesday, September 9 at 6:56 p.m. after a c-section. He's the cutest little guy and healthy so we couldn't ask for anything more. We'll have some pics posted soon.

I can't believe I'm a mom. Brandon is really good with Travis and I can tell he's going to be an awesome Dad. We'll bring the little guy around soon, but I need a bit of recovery time before we get too social.

They sent me home to wait it out a few more days. My blood pressure measured a lot lower at the hospital than it did at the doc's office and an internal exam confirmed my body still hasn't started the process AT ALL. We were told it was our choice to go forward with the induction tonight or wait it out a bit longer...reading between the lines, coming home seemed to be the best course of action.

So they're sending me to the hospital tonight to begin the labor induction process. I could be in the hospital a few days before the baby is actually born, then a few days after delivery.

I am not reacting well to the reality that I will have a child in the next few days. Thank god I can go back on the meds as soon as baby is delivered.

Good news is they sent me home. Bad news is they want me on stricter bed rest, meaning I have to stay laying down on my side instead of just sitting with my feet up. That means less time for working and computer stuff.

Right now I'm still borderline enough that they're not going to risk and induction with an unfavorable cervix. This means we have more time for my body to get to the labor stage on its own. I'll go back to the doc on Thursday morning for another round of blood pressure and swelling checks, urine tests, and then see if they need to send me to the hospital for another ultrasound, non-stress test and additional blood tests to check for preeclampsia.

It also looks like the Labor & Delivery unit is booked solid through this weekend so unless induction or c-section becomes truly medically necessary or if I go into labor on my own, chances are we won't be induced until sometime next week.

Went to the doc this morning and did not get an official diagnosis of preeclampsia. I do still have lots of swelling and elevated blood pressure, but the blood tests and urine protein tests came back normal so the doc is sticking with a diagnosis of "pregnancy-induced hypertension."

Even still, they do want to induce my labor and it'll just be a matter of when. I could check in to the hospital as early as tonight, or wait a day or two to see if labor happens on its own. I haven't shown any signs of labor yet and the doc does not want me to get past my due date.

Since I haven't had any of the signs of labor (contractions, dilation, spotting) they'll need to put me through a process called "cervical ripening" before I can get pitocin to induce contractions. Doc said the chance of a c-section is about 50%, depending on how my body reacts to the induction process. Obviously we'll get a c-section if medically necessary, but I don't know what I'll do if that happens. I only have enough time banked for a 6-week leave and a c-section will put me on a mandatory 8-week leave.

Also, since I haven't shown any of the signs of labor the induction process could take 2-3 days before labor begins, then it'll be a matter of how labor progresses.

On top of everything else, our street is undergoing major construction so there's no access to and from our house for the next few days. Could timing be any worse?

On top of everything else, our "budget" oil bill is $475 per month for an annual total of $5,225. There is just no way we can take on that plus the monthly expense of childcare. Have I mentioned how much I hate money?

Comment and I'll give you a letter; then you have to list ten things you LOVE that begin with that letter. Afterward, post this in your journal and give out some letters of your own.

Tim gave me the letter M...

In no particular order, my responses:

1. Media - right now electronic media have captured my interest, but other forms are fun to study too
2. M&Ms - I'm still a fan of the original milk chocolate ones, but you won't find me saying no to Peanut, Krispie, Almond or other varieties
3. Market Research - not only is it my job, it's a cool mix of geek and creative that seems perfectly suited to me
4. Marriage - This time around :)
5. Midori Sours
6. Mickey Mouse
7. Music - especially live shows
8. Movies - action, sci-fi, drama
9. Mexican folk art
10. MLB

Doc ordered me to bed rest today. We're doing all kinds of tests this weekend to find out if I have preeclampsia and need to have labor induced. Looks like this baby is coming soon, for better or worse.

That said, not sure if I'll be able to attend any Labor Day festivities. I still have to ok to work from home or the office for my day job, but there will be no more Eddie Bauer shifts until I get the ok from the doc to go back.

We'll be repacking the hospital bag tonight just to be ready.